Sunday, August 23, 2009

A Review of the Movie, "Lazarus Man"

The award-winning movie "Lazarus Man," starring Barack Obama, typified the American mindset of the early century.

One of the pivotal scenes of the movie is described below.


Teacher's Lounge. Barack Obama is an idealistic young history teacher for Eighth Grade students. He is bewildered by the apathy of the teaching staff, and the absolute, immobile stupidity of the classes. He is speaking with one of the senior teachers.


O>I don't get it. You sit there and read the paper during every class, and give them nothing but thinly-veiled contempt - let them drift in and out of the room, talk, fight. You make no pretense to teach them. Why do they hate me more than they hate you?

It's because you suck as a shepherd, Obama. You bring the sheep out in the meadow, and torture them for your own selfish entertainment. At least get under a tree, get drunk and fall asleep. That's what good shepherds have done through the ages.

O>But I want to DO something - to make a DIFFERENCE in their lives.

Obama - you have come face to face with the soul of your species, and you don't like it. You don't like reality. THEY are reality. All a sheep really cares about is being next to the ass-hole of the nearest sheep. Anything else makes them scared.

O>But I was NOTHING like them when I was in school!

That's because you are a mistake, a genetic aberration. All of this shit about fresh-faced, eager young students looking for knowledge - those are the occasional and rare, the little blips that the race sends out every once in a while, to ask a question. The question is - "ARE WE INTELLIGENT BEINGS?" The answer is "NO." And you won't face reality for long enough to understand that. So you torture the sheep.

Every class has one or two of them, like you, every few years. The other students usually beat the shit out of them, for a good reason. They are dangerous to the herd. They might grow up and be like YOU.

O>I can't stand it. So we're supposed to sit back and produce ANOTHER generation that grows up, becomes miserable, gets drunk, lives for nothing, beats their wives and kids? Like we don't care?

As opposed to what, Barama? You have just described the character of our species - it's no difference than pointing out that sheep live in herds, bees in hives, that lions eat herbivores. That's what we do, by and large. It's the caring part - that's an alien idea, as foreign as though it came from Mars. Ask your class. Go ahead, you got balls? Ask them how to be a better teacher. They'll tell you to read the paper and leave them the fuck alone.


All you really are, Barama, is a spore of a bad idea, a terrible idea - that stuff that we teach right out of Civics 101, that Tom Jefferson horseshit. It's a lot better that they associate him with President's Day Sales Events, and Mount Rushmore, than the crap that you're peddling, that you have in your head.

You serve a useful function to society. You encapsulate those with the potential for bad ideas - your fellow fresh-faced idealists - and protect the herd from them. Think of your "greatest inspiration," your favorite teacher. He or she did society a favor. Look what happened to you. Look where YOU wound up with, you with your best ideas.

O>But I'm here to teach! To give somebody a chance!!

Whatever got you here - it protected the herd. You didn't go to a place where you could cause the greatest damage. People like Lenin and Hitler - they caused some serious damage to the herd. Not you. Thank God.

Every time, some fucker with a vision, some idealistic-minded asshole, gets up there - and usually he's psychopathic enough to snare a shitload of people in his delusion - a Believer. Every time some fucker like you gets into a dangerous position, the species takes a hit.


That's why Jesus walked on the deal. Took a dive. Willingly walked into the Wheel of Karma - more like a sawblade.

You like history, Obama? Here's this for you. All the contemporary Gospel literature was about the return of the Line of David. Jesus came down, and had the choice - go ahead with the plan, or face the reality of what He really created. He took the Dive. He walked on us. The whole rest of Christian literature is all about papering over that fact. He dumped us.

"All the New Jerusalem stuff? Not here, not on this planet, not with this mis-begotten species.  It's all right there in the Bible, see?  They had to do a little creative revision to get the story out that Jesus still loves us.  They spun the Temptation by the Devil, and the story of the Three Tabernacles, out of the Gethsemane story.  That's when he walked.  The night before.  It's all one story.  He thought about becoming the New David for all of us - and he said, 'fuck it.'"


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